4 Answers
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Hmm, our reasons were more circumstantial. I was about to return to work after having our second child. And the nanny share situation we were in with my older child would not have been able to accommodate my daughter (or for that matter, two extra children as the other mom we are sharing the nanny with *also* had a second child).
So, the other mom and I both felt it was right to move the older kids into a preschool and then have the nanny take care of the younger kids.
As far as what I was looking for in a preschool the top contenders had to be a) fulltime and b) year-round since both parents work fulltime. That alone drastically limited our selections and it came down to just which school had openings.
Unfortunately, my son is having some other problems at school, which we are not sure if it's because of the school itself or other issues. But that's another story.
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The early years are SO important that I think if she loves the stimulation from the preschool and the kids, I would start her. Not full time if you don't have to, but 5 mornings/week or 3 days/week or whatever works for your family and the school. But it sounds like she is ready for a little slice of the wider world now, so give it to her.
As for what is worth paying for, I would say quality. Ratio of caregivers to kids. Interesting things to do in the classroom. To a lesser degree, outdoor play space (more important when older but at 20 months, not so much), an organized classroom and school. I know this sounds lame but I love that our younger kids' school provides food -- just one less thing for us to do (plus I like that all the kids eat the same thing).
We needed only part time care for our youngest when he was 9 months old but enrolled him in a school with only a full time option because it was such a great place. It has a 2:1 ratio, lots of cool projects, lots of parental involvement. Even though it was TRIPLE the price of the part time place he was going to, it is absolutely worth the money to us.
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Our considerations starting our son in preschool at age 2.5 sounded similar to yours in terms of letting him have interaction with other kids. But actually, it was not until the kids in the class were closer to 3 that they really started playing together and not just in parallel. I think it was still a good age to start having him around other kids.
Here are other developmental milestone types of considerations that I noticed kids in the class developing (we were at a coop so I was in class many days):
Independence and separation - time away from parents - even if you've had a babysitter before. It's time away from home that is in another safe/familiar environment where the ratio is not 1:1 or 1:2.
Exploration and confidence-building - they can explore a very large area more or less on their own.
Practice paying attention while in a group during story time/circle time.
Practice following a schedule and routine.
Learn from other kids, especially for following directions, trying new foods, and potty-training.
Having said all that though, there are other ways besides preschool to foster some of those things.
One of my favorite things about preschool for my son was finding playdate friends for him (and me :) ).
